BREAKING: 190 lbs. of Bullshit Missing from Crawford, TX!

From a Kos diary:

The Mayor of Crawford, Texas has warned the rest of the United States and international bullshit inspectors that nearly 190 lbs of worthless, foul-smelling, bullshit - used to start wars, curb civil liberties and generally fuck things up - are missing from a tin-horn ranch near Crawford.

The huge facility, called Prairie Chapel, was supposed to be under control of two Mexican maids, but is now a no-man's land, still picked over by oil industry creditors as recently as Saturday. United Nations bullshit inspectors had monitored the sack of shit for many years, but White House and Pentagon officials acknowledge that the huge pile of dung vanished after the Supreme Court fucked up in 2000.

American bullshit experts say their immediate concern is that the bullshit could be used to further erode the rights of women and minorities in the U.S. The bullshit, usually used to make thriving businesses fail, could be used to fuck up the entire country. For example, the bullshit that traded Sammy Sosa from the Rangers to the White Sox was much less powerful than the amount missing today, which could be used to start wars across much of the middle east.

-- Benj